Wasp

Scott and I agree on most things in life, but there is one thing we have always disagreed on, and after today, I'm afraid it will become even more of a problem.

When there is a spider or a bee or some kind of bug in the house we have different approaches. I find the biggest shoe that has the flattest tread (you see if the tread is too deep them the thing can get away, or worse get on you and bit/sting/or otherwise harm)you. Scott however, looks for a cup or a Tupperware to catch the bug/spider/bee and take it outside to return it to the beautiful world in which we live.

Today, there was a wasp in our house. For some dumb reason I thought instead of squishing it, I should "save" it. Dumb, dumb, dumb idea.

I grabbed a Tupperware and the lid. Do a little catch and release... I thought. It was flying around in the window in our room (which is huge, like five feet by 15 feet). Catching it was pretty easy. I just covered it with the tuppy while standing on the couch. Then it got tricky. I didn't have the guts to try and put the lid on. Scott usually has a piece of paper that is flat so you just slide it over the top. The pesky thing wouldn't fly into the container, it kept trying to find a way out.

I stood there on the couch, with my Tupperware and the wasp with no apparent way to end this ordeal. For 10 minutes! I was too scared to try and uncover it and squish it. By this time he was attaching the Tupperware with his poky tail. He was hitting it so hard I could hear it tap. Yikes!

I started to wonder how long I would be there. I realized I needed help. I needed a piece of paper, or someone with more courage than I had. I resorted to my two-year-old. I had nowhere else to turn to. He was in his room taking a nap. Which must have been a pretty good one because no matter how much I yelled, he didn't come.

I started wondering if my landlords would be back soon. I heard a diesel coming up the road and hoped it was them. Nope. UPS man... and then he stopped. He had a package for us!!! He could be my hero and save the day. I don't know how this is possible, but he came up, set the package down, and didn't even see me standing there in the window looking like a fool. I was too embarrassed to yell at him through the window to direct him to the back door (because the front was locked) so he could help me. I watched as he walked away and then it started.

My heart started racing, I started thinking I would be there for the rest of my life. I think it was some kind of mini-panic attack. I got resourceful. I thought maybe if I tap the Tupperware really quickly on the window I could get him to fly back in so I could put the lid on. I didn't work. Instead he got half way out and was stuck as I pushed the Tupperware against the window again. I didn't waste any time. I finished the job. I didn't like doing it, but it had to be done. My baby was crying, I was practically crying. This episode had to come to and end.

And now, I'm here to tell you that unless you are trained in the art of "catch and release" debugging... just squish it.